This past month I’ve been so emotionally stressed with work that my training schedule (running) has dipped (only been making it out to the Thursday evening group runs) because I’ve been too drained to summon the motivation I usually have for running. It’s driving me crazy that I’ve only been doing 1-2 runs per week, yet I just don’t feel like forcing myself to hit the pavement.
The whole situation at work has been pretty on-going since school started this year because I’m with a different teacher this year (a teacher that a couple of the assistants that worked with her last year felt the same way I’m feeling and requested a move for this year, which is how I got stuck in it). I’ve been blessed with the other two classrooms that I’ve been in because I was well-matched with the teacher and other assistants that I’ve worked with in both those rooms, but this one not so much. I just have a more nurturing/easy-going personality when it comes to dealing with the kids than the teacher and one of the other assistants I’m working with now. I also feel this teacher is a bit more rough on the kids, verbally speaking, than she should be, which is also what’s tying me up in knots. I also feel like ever since I spoke with the principal last week, this teacher has been putting me under a microscope to find errors in anything and everything I do. My introverted personality can only handle so much at a time and working with two people that have very high-strung, extroverted personalities is a lot. All the stress just has been building up until the exhaustion finally caught up.
I am thankful and blessed for my parents, who have been really helping to make me enjoy my weekends and forget about all the work-stress I’ve been experiencing. And if I’ve had particularly stressful day, I know I can pop over for dinner and a movie/game night to de-stress.
But enough of this heavy, depressing state-of-mind I’ve been plunged into. I have 9 full days off for Thanksgiving break and I fully intend on writing and reading loads in that time. I want to finish the first draft of my MG Fantasy (Art Matters), as well as write more on my official nano plot. I sense some 10K days are on the horizon.
I also had a great interview with a day care for a 3pm-6pm teacher position. One of the women that works in the high school cafeteria with my mom told my mom about the available position and how much they needed help because she works at the day care after-school. I have a working interview on Monday at 10pm to get a feel for the 2-year-old classroom and the other two teachers that are in it. I’ll have to do some online courses through myflorida/child care since day care requires different certifications than working for the school board, but I think it’ll be worth it in the end. Plus, my horoscope and career horoscope were spot on yesterday and today, which I’m generally skeptical when it comes to astrology, but I’m taking it as a good sign that adding this afternoon job would truly be beneficially toward gaining even more teaching experience for me in the long run. Plus, I love working with the little kids. They’re a lot of fun and they love school. And this position is Mon-Fri, so it’ll be great to have a guaranteed second income.
Reading update – I’m currently reading an ebook on my nook when I’m out and about, and a hardcover when I’m home.
- Dragon’s Keeper by Robin Hobb – (I’m around 15% into this and loving it). It’s the first Robin Hobb novel I’ve picked up and already I can tell that I’ve found a new favorite fantasy author.
- Winter (Lunar Chronicles, #4) – I started this earlier this week an am 80 pages into (only been doing a little reading before bedtime each night this week, but I’ll more than likely finish this over Thanksgiving break because I’m enjoying it so far.
And that’s a wrap. If you made it through this whole post, then I appreciate you for reading my downtrodden rants. Writing this post has helped me to vent out a lot of my stress. That’s usually how I deal with things. Writing everything down is the main transference that works when I’m under stress because I don’t handle conflict well (usually shutting down and isolating myself is what I end up doing, like a startled deer). I try to get through it, and usually I can, but this time is different. The verbal incidents are just leaving too much stressful trauma in its wake, especially considering anything that is done incorrectly falls on my shoulders with this teacher, even if I wasn’t the one to do the task. I basically feel like a scapegoat. But that’s enough of that. Onward full speed ahead!